Finding Time For Blogging

Ok, it has been a crazy couple of weeks, between basketball games, volleyball games, religion activities, work, painting, Dr. appts and tax season, I feel like it is impossible for me to find any time to get anything done.  I love my kids so much, but some days they can seem very needy and maybe it is just me, trying to find time to juggle it all.  Last night, I had one child icing an ankle, one icing a finger, and one icing a toe, and then to top it off, my college daughter called to tell me she just got out of urgent care and broke her arm.  OMG what next.  I have 4 children ages 18, 17, 13, and 11 and they are great kids, but those 3 older ones sometimes are a bit needy and last night was one of those nights, and my 11 year old just wanted me to take him to the book fair, thats all and I just didn't make the time for it and now I feel aweful.  He looked at me this morning and said, " I'm mad you didn't take me to the Bookfair, I really wanted to go."  How do I find time to make everyone happy?   That is my question.  Oh and don't forget, I also have a husband and a business.  Yes I know as moms, we try to do it all and I sometimes think that doing it all isn't the hard part, it is the emotional rollercoaster that is hard.  Dealing with the good and the bad and trying very hard to keep everyone somewhat happy.  So my question is, How do we find a good balance that makes everyone happy, including me?  Please if anyone has advice, I would love to hear it.

Being a good parent

Ok, are we all just in this world competing to be a good parent or are we competing with the parent next to us?  What is it about the kid who is good at everything that makes us jealous or want are kids to be more like that.  We should be happy for that child and encourage them and tell them good job.  We can still do that as an adult and still push our own children to work harder and do better.  My goal this year when it comes to my kids is just that.  I want to wish other kids well and hope that they do good too.  But at times, it is hard and when jealousy creeps up on us evil will come out.  I have 2 children involved in sports and let me tell you, I have seen some sides to parents that sometimes is unbelievable and sometimes I have thought things that I'm not proud of or would not repeat.   And maybe this is all normal, but a part of me feels, If I can have a conscious about it and maybe the mom next to me does, are world would be a little bit of a nicer place.  Of course I want my kid to do great, but that doesn't mean I don't want there teammate to do great also.  Each one of those kids on a team deserve to have there moment, or a great game, or a great play and at one point or another each one may have a bad game or a bad moment but they will learn to be a team and work together, and that is what is important.   I know "I can't be alone in these feelings"  Is there any parents out there who maybe has felt the same way or is maybe frustrated with the activities there child is involved in.  I would love to hear from you.    

Missing you Grandma

Well, It was a year ago today that my Grandma passed away and I've been thinking about her alot and how much I miss her.  She was such a great person and very giving and I hope she knows how much she was loved and is missed.  I remember the entire day exactly and the few weeks leading up to her death which is very heartbreaking.  I don't think she suffered any physical pain, but emotionally she was very sad inside and I could see it, but she understood us and knew how deeply she was loved.  I hope she knows that there is not a day that does not go by that I don't think of her, miss her, and feel so lucky to have had her in my life.  Today is a day to remember her, look at pictures and remember all of the great times we had with her. 

Busy week with other things on my mind

Ok, I know I haven't blogged all week.  It has been a busy week, between Dr. appts, Dentist appts, work and games, I'm exhausted when I get home in the evening.  I have had lots on my mind, and it is amazing how as a mom we worry about one thing until something worse comes along to worry about and it is like one problem out the window and the other one in my mind.  My youngest daughter experienced a seizure like episode last week in school that seems to be unexplainable.  I know these things can happen and never happen again and they ran all the proper test and nothing showed up and since then, she seems fine, like always.  After a follow up visit, we are scheduled for another test and then an appt. with a neurologist.  I know this is normal follow up but I can't help to be a little scared and a little worried.  Now worrying  about one child sitting on the bench in an activity seems very small and minor of course when I'm worried about the health of another child.  Is life just one worry after another?  Do we stress even over little things until something worse comes along ?  I know I can't be alone in this and there has to be other mom's out there who feel the same way.  I know all the sayings, " don't sweat the small stuff ", but do we, if there is nothing bigger to stress about or is it just me?

"Happy Birthday" to my T

Happy Birthday to my oldest son.  He turns 17 today.  Wow, 17 years and what a great kid I have.  I remember when he was born, he was so little and my Dad said to me one day, " this little guy needs some extra loving " and he has been his #1 fan ever since.  Supporting him through all of his activities and always being there for him.  I looked at him last night and thought, I cannot believe it was 17 years ago today that I had this baby boy.  He has not always been the easiest kid but he has always had this caring and sensitive part of him that makes him stand out.  He is not your average cocky, strong teenager, he is mild, polite and has this great smile that he gives you to let you know everything is going OK.  I'm not sure if it was the way we raised him or just the type of kid he his.  People always say, " you have such a great kid".  The kid has not always had it the easiest either.  He has always had to fight for things he wanted, with school, sports and even friendships.  I always say he will be very successful because he is used of working so hard, to get very little. 

Could it get any worse?

OK, I know it could get worse but sometimes I feel like I'm the only one.  Spending a night at a game watching everyone else's kid play and not mine it is very hard to sit there.  I try to keep a smile on my face and be supportive but it is hard.  Kids works so hard and fight so hard and then sometimes never get the chance.  I have to tell myself, this is a small part of there life. But you know what, it is still hard.   Why does life seem so unfair sometimes?  Yes I know things could always be much worse, but you know what, they sometimes could be better too.  Is it just me who feels this way?  Am I just too wrapped up in my kids life?   Maybe I am.  To take my mind of things, I think I'm going to start rearranging my house.  I have one in college and maybe it is time to start a craft room or something.  I love to paint and maybe a room in my house needs a fresh look.  I'm going to grab a pile of magazines and a blanket and try to relax and get some painting inspirations, and try not to think about kids for a while. 

A glass of wine sounds great tonight!

A glass of wine sounds great tonight and a trip to Paris even better. OK I can dream, right?  It has been a tough week in my household and some days raising kids in a what seems like an unfair world can be so hard.  My children, my most sensitive thing.  When they hurt, you hurt and if only like when they were little, we could make all there sadness go away.  It is not that easy when they are teenagers, I can no longer fix everything to make it go there way.  They have to learn things sometimes the hard way and figure things out for themselves.  That is my biggest challenge in raising kids today.  And I know I can't be alone?  This is a blog for mom's and anyone who is struggling with the same kind of challenges.  I love to give advice and I'm always ready to listen to some too.  I have had so many thoughts going through my head and I know that growing up and being a teenager is hard, I remember myself, but never did I think it would be this hard as a parent, really sometimes I feel like I'm on the edge and ready to break.  I know it is a small part of there life but why why why is it so hard?